Friday, August 14, 2009

Something in the water

Friday's finally here. Nick's over the flu and now we'll be able to get back to normal. There's a couple coming tonight to look at the house (think happy thoughts), and we'll just hang out this evening. My brother lands tomorrow morning and we'll spend the weekend together.

Yesterday morning there was a disturbing scene outside that I haven't been able to get out of my mind. It was early, before 7 and I was upstairs near the window. My neighbors were outside and the husband was screaming at his wife. I only heard the tail end, when he screamed "fuck the neighbors! I told you not to do that." The wife, usually so together and confident looked weak and frightened. There was something in both his tone and those words -- something that struck me as abusive though I've never seen evidence of that before -- that has stayed with me.

It made me idly wonder if there wasn't a marriage curse on the houses in our row. There are three houses on this stretch of block. My marriage ended shortly after we moved here (though we bought the house knowing the marriage had a sell-by date.) The couple two doors down split up within the last year, and the wife moved out. And now this couple, who lives in the house between us is showing signs of problems. Or at the very least they were having an extremely bad day. I've no way to know if this was anomalous or if it goes on all the time but inside the house where no one can hear.

For me of course the divorce has been a blessing, as it has for my ex. We're both happy, and in my case at least happier than I've ever been. Nick has changed my life, my world and my perspective. I am no longer convinced that the universe is a malignant, scheming place made up of land mines and trap doors, a web of trickery that requires me to have an unending resource of safety nets, plan b's and back up plans. Nick's universe is benign and supportive. In the words of our president, let me be clear. It's not so much that I no longer hold my original dark views; it's more that I feel I'm now part of his universe.

But I can't help but wonder what's in the water on this block.

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