Thursday, December 31, 2009

Home

We came home on Tuesday night, after we realized that staying till Wednesday morning offered no advantage. Great time in Montauk, and on the last night we had dinner at the Palm. Liv and Nick had steak, and I had my long-awaited (10+ years) lambchops. No fireworks, no sign of the heavens opening, nothing. But they were good, I enjoyed them and ate them without consequences. We spent the day in the usual way -- hanging out, going to the gym, etc. When we got back to the hills we had dinner at Baluchi's, which will now replace Tandoor as our favorite local Indian joint. Better location, far better atmosphere and food that was not only as good but tasted fresher.

Yesterday was a catch-up day. Much hubbub at the house -- 2 showings though only one materialized, and a series of calls from an odd broker who claims to have a customer but is really only looking to take over the listing as it expired yesterday (we renewed with Judy, of course.)

Good reports from Matt in the UK, though he's all at sixes and sevens -- the British friend they were meeting was apparently hospitalized with psychosis. All his plans are obviously up in the air, but he sounds sanguine about the whole thing.

Also good reports from Gena about her latest date (per her email she blew off MS guy for Matzo Ball guy -- as much as that sounds like code it actually makes a kind of sense.)

We spent the day catching up, doing errands etc, having mojitos and playing Scrabble. Nick broke my (8-game) winning streak. Tonight we're supposed to go into the city to a bar where there's a Celtic band, but the weather is quite surprising so we'll see. Nick's off to the Island to do his stuff and reclaim Holly, and the roads will be a mess.

Spoke to hip ortho who said he'd been in touch with the rheum (got an email from her too); does't look like any kind of inflammatory arthritis but that doesn't change the need for a hip replacement. As far as my back goes, he says that will continue to flare up and if it continues or worsens it'll be time to bring in Dave (spine guy.) We'll see.

It's very beautiful out now with all the snow (yes, I can say that because I don't have to drive in it.)

Monday, December 28, 2009

Montauk Monday

We left yesterday at about 11 -- me, Nick, Olivia and Holly. A few local stops first to pick up missing toiletries and other necessities, and then we drove about an hour to take Holly to the kennel. She couldn't have been more excited; as we neared the place she was all over the car trying to get out.

From there to Montauk, with a couple of Starbucks stops along the way. Our suite is lovely and plenty big for the three of us. We hung out awhile and then had an early dinner at Harvest, known for its gargantuan portions (the garlic mashed reminded me of the mashed potato scene from Close Encounters.) Then back to the hotel where we played some boggle and watched an episode of Big Love.

We woke late today -- after 9. Nick had trouble sleeping on the rock-hard mattress. After coffee (too strong -- the Starbucks we picked up is way stronger than the Dunkin Donuts we use at home) the three of us headed to the gym. Liv likes the elliptical, Nick did the treadmill and I did the bike (hard on my back and hip but did it anyway.) Also some time on the universal. After showers we went to town for brunch at Anthony's (one of the two pancake houses across the street from each other.) We made a few stops so Liv could take photos, which she's really into.

We came back, watched the movie Big Fish (not bad), took a short rest and in a few minutes will start to get ready for dinner. We had some reading time. Olivia: Atonement. Nick: a Cormac McCarthy novel. Me: a new history of the Second World War.

We're headed to the Palm in East Hampton. Liv will have steak, Nick wants duck and I'll have my first lamb chops in a decade. We decided a few months back that I'm ready to introduce new food into my diet, and of the available red meats selected lamb ("he don't eat meat? I'll make lamb!" -- we've all been saying that since the decision was made.)

Then back here, maybe a few more games, a movie and more reading time. A very relaxing and restorative day, and so great that Liv is here.

Sunday, December 27, 2009

Eventful days

The past few days have been filled with incident. Matt left for the UK -- haven't heard from him yet. Olivia went shopping with her holiday money yesterday and was pickpocketed. She called me in tears and within about an hour I was getting calls from Bank of America about suspicious charges on the card -- including Auto Zone and a Shell station. Clearly no grass grew under the feet of the thief. It was interesting to note the difference in customer service between BOA and Citi. I called Citi, and couldn't get through to a person and didn't have the account number. I used gethuman.com to figure out how to get through to a live operator, which worked, but the experience was less than satisfactory: the person I spoke with was curt, asked me the same questions over and over and seemed to be having trouble with the entire thing. BOA on the other hand was courteous and sympathetic -- asked if Olivia was ok and what else they could do. Big difference.

And she was having such a good day right up to that point. She was with her friends, with money in her pocket. And she was scouted by an Abercrombie employee who was looking for models to work in the store today. But she's under 18, so that didn't work. But it made her feel great, and she floated inside that bubble right up until the moment she realized her wallet was gone.

Nick's girls had their own adventure when they left here and spent the day with their mom. A day of texting that started out fine but then devolved as their day did with issues including their mom's drinking, suicide threats and then a call to the cops.

Gena came over yesterday to hang out, which was great. We got to spend time and catch up, and she did a bit of shopping in my closet (ended up with a couple of really nice things from what I think of as my 2005 collection.)

Then last night we all decided that Olivia would come with us to Montauk, which is perfect. We'll set out in a few hours and take Holly to the kennel. We'll do everything we planned, and Liv is up for it -- reading, working out, checking out Montauk, going out to dinner, swimming and the hot tub. She's selected Atonement to read while we're there; an excellent choice. She even plans to go to the gym.

Right now we're all packing and straightening up and otherwise prepping (save Liv, who's still asleep but not for long.)

I hear doors opening and closing (nothing is quiet in this house) so I'm assuming she's up. This will be a great couple of days.

Friday, December 25, 2009

Christmas day

It's about 8:45 a.m. I was the first one up but I think I hear Nikki stirring downstairs. Yesterday was great. Nick and I exchanged gifts in the morning. I gave him 3 things: an ice-cream maker, a Garmin nav system for his new truck and a gift certificate for a couples class at the cooking school called ICE (formerly known as Peter Kump.) His gifts to me were wonderful. Lots of things to keep me warm: slippers, slipper-socks, PJ's, a hoodie and a robe. A new alarm clock to replace our current one. Why the need? I'm not gentle when the alarm goes off in the morning and I may have been a bit overzealous when trying to turn it off -- now the buttons pop off all the time. My appliances live hard.

But the best gift he gave me was a beautiful gold snake ring with turquoise. He'd remembered a story I'd told him and Liv about a snake ring I'd wanted when I was a kid and we were in Greece. The seller wanted badly to sell it, I wanted it with all my heart but my mom said that the sight of me with a snake around my finger would have been too much for my grandmother. So all these years later I have my snake ring, and it's beautiful.

Nick brought his girls over in the afternoon and we hung out for a couple of hours before dinner. Everyone got along and it went well. After dinner we watched a movie (The Hangover) which was predictably but satisfyingly funny. He tried to use the ice-cream machine but it hadn't chilled long enough so he'll try it again today. We'll wrap up some extra cookies (I made three kinds) for Liv to take to Tessa's later.

This morning Nick will drive the girls home to Eastern LI and then come back.

It's our last day with Matt, who leaves tonight for the UK and who's been really fun to have at home. Liv no doubt disagrees but he's really been fine.

Bon voyage Matt! Have a great trip and we love you.

Thursday, December 24, 2009

I am divorced

As of last night, it's official. I wasn't the first to know; Paul texted me to tell me that he was notified by mail that according to the Honorable Sidney F. Straus we are officially divorced. I spoke to my lawyer who didn't know but who looked it up on line while we stayed on the phone (elaw.com) and she confirmed it.


It didn't quite sink in at first; we were pretty boozy from mojitos and everything was a bit blurry. But I woke up this morning single for the first time in many many years (21 if you count from the marriage, more like 26 if you go back to before Paul and I met.) Wow. The end of an era. I want to see the decree. I think of it as a single piece of paper, embossed, stamped, decorated and suitable for framing, but Nick tells me it's not like that at all. Still...


So it's done. It took long enough but it's finally officially and irrevocably done. Whew.

Tonight we're having dinner with all the kids. Nick's picking up the girls now. Matt's back from lunch and Liv will be here later. We're serving shrimp cocktail, calamari, lasagne, home-made breadsticks and salad. May order some Chinese food to make Matt happy (Jews eat Chinese food on Christmas, after all.) And for dessert: I made three kinds of cookies: chewy chocolate, chocolate chocolate chip and pecan crescents (made with the pecans Nick's mom shelled and sent.) And as a special treat, homemade ice cream. I bought Nick an ice-cream maker (one of my gifts to him; more on the gift exchange tomorrow.)

A banner day.

Saturday, December 19, 2009

Happy birthday Holly

Holly turned one year old a few days ago. She hasn't evidenced much maturity with the passage of time. She has a new and unwelcome trick: she drags the fireplace grate open enough for her to get in and drag out the burnt charcoal. Face smudged and guilty, she knows she's in trouble but keeps doing it again and again. Nick bought a new gate that's helping keep her in the living room, which is helpful. But she's a Jack Russell -- busy, smart, obstinate -- and it shows in everything she does. I worked from home yesterday and she stayed most of the day in her (unlocked) pen in the sunroom. Nick moved it closer to the radiator and she loves the warmth. The problem though is obvious: she sleeps all day and by the evening is a whirling dervish, vibrating with energy and intensity. She's so damned cute that it makes everything ok. Nice evolutionary turn, I'd say -- her size and appearance protect her. Clever.

Big storm coming

That's what they say -- that we're about to be blanketed with snow. We're ready: Nick did a thousand errands yesterday and we're loaded up with salt and scrapers, firewood and food, just in case. We're having dinner tonight with my parents, and are scheduled to see the last play tomorrow in the Brother/Sister play trilogy, but we'll see what the weather permits.


Olivia and I met with the college counselor the other night. It started out rocky -- they didn't really know each other -- but got better. The good news is that Liv is reasonable and focused; she knows what she wants (and more importantly what she doesn't want). She wants to stay in NY and go to a school with a strong performance program. And we brainstormed some ideas to help her distinguish herself. I love what we collaboratively came up with: a project that combines performance and service. The idea is simple: work with a couple of her performing-arts friends to bring to life children's stories with acting and music. Either live or by DVD this little troupe would bring the stories to sick children in area hospitals. This is a great way for Olivia to combine her strong desire for service with her estimable leadership schools and love of performance. I've gotten in touch with the executive director the Starlight Foundation, an organization we support pro bono which works directly with hospitalized kids, and she sounded open and interested. Nick and I will help her in any way we can, and she couldn't be more excited about this.

Matt got in late last night, and was pretty cheerful, though tired from finals and traveling. He'll be home for a few days catching up on eating and sleeping before he leaves next week for the UK. We started talking last night about healthcare reform and the degree of our disgust and frustration with what's going on, but neither of us had much heart for the conversation, so it's tabled till today.

It wasn't an easy week: travel (I did San Francisco as a day trip, and I don't recommend it), tons of meetings, work, issues and complexity, back/hip pain bad enough to ground me on Sunday and Monday. And no answers in sight on my physical issues. Hip ortho suddenly not returning calls; rheum requested and will be reviewing films and reports, and an overall sense that no one is really in charge of figuring this thing out. I hope to know more next week but I'm not feeling terribly confident about the medical professionals in my orbit and their willingness and ability to look at this situation and deal with it in a rational and comprehensive way.